All Relationships are not Perfect but all Relationships are not Safe

Intimate relationships that are formed by adults that were victims of child abuse, carry that emotion, anger and resentment. They can be triggered at any giving time and not even realize what is happening. Believe it or not even people in relationships have been abused. “Domestic violence occurs when one person is in an intimate relationship or marriage tries to dominate and control of the other person” . Just like Child abuse, domestic violence is not always reported so the number of incidents that occur are not truly accurate.

For example, in musical artist, Eve Johan Jeffers-Cooper, who goes by the stage name Eve “Love is Blind” music video? “The song is based on the real life story of Eve’s best friend, Andrea” . The words tell a story about how she had so much hate for someone she didn’t know.

All she knew was that her best friend was dating a guy that would constantly physically, verbally and emotionally abuse her and she tried to do everything she could to help her.

Eve opens the song with a heavy feeling of hate and resentment for a man she doesn’t even know, “Hey, you I don’t even know you and I hate you See all I know is that my girlfriend used to date you How would you feel if she held you down and raped you? Tried and tried, but she never could escape you”. The fear of the victim’s abuser finding you or hurting their family is what keeps you there.

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The feeling of being weak and not knowing how to stand on their own two feet makes them run back to what they know. Which is one thing that someone who isn’t or was abused will never know or understand. During the interview that Queen Latifah conducted with Eve and Andrea, Andrea talks about how it all started with verbal abuse and the threats to have her killed by people on the street.

With that being said if not all most cases domestic violence against woman end in death. Domestic violence does not discriminate against men or women. You are will more than likely hear stories about woman as victims of abuse than men. One can only guess assume men don’t report being abused because of pride. The advice that all victims receive in these circumstances is often to leave immediately. As easy as it is to say, it’s not that easy for a victim of abuse to just leave. It takes time, strategic planning and knowing that they will be able to push through the start over process. Most of reported cases are woman who were battered by a significant others. According to the National Coalition against Domestic Violence, “10 million Americans are victims of domestic violence annually” . The NCADV also states that, “1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men are victims of domestic violence during their lifetime”. “76% of females are victims of domestic violence, while 24% are men” . But, “only 1 in 7 women are severely injured because of abuse, and 1 in 18 men are also severely injured because of abuse”.

After collecting numerous amounts of data, it show that most domestic violence against females usually will occur between the ages of 18-24 and 25-34. “Since the Women’s Act was in 1994 was initiated, the number of incidents has declined by 67%” (NCADV). According to The Britannica Encyclopedia, in 1994, “President Bill Clinton initially signed the bill to call attention to domestic violence, dating violence, sexual assault, and staking” (Ami Lynch). “It was initially enacted as title IV of the violent crime control and law enforcement act. This gave way for many other places to start programs to help the victims of abuse, such as, the office of violence against women”. These are just two of the many resolutions that were put in place to protect women who were abused by a significant other. Domestic Violence has been the cause of many different mental and emotional problems for many people, men and women included. Although no victim will ever get forget what happened to them, they will begin to heal with help being provided to them once it is sought out.