Interpersonal Communication and Conflict Resolution

Engagement it’s such a beautiful time in your life. My husband and I have been married for 4 years. I also just took a class on interpersonal communications and I am honored to share with you some of what I learned in a great variety of some personal experiences. Studying how your partner communicates and uses verbal and non-verbal communication is very important in a relationship, will help in preventing miscommunications going in to your marriage that there will be conflict but learning how to avoid or resolve those conflicts will help you have a successful marriage.

I know you both love each other very much and that will help get you through those difficult times.

Interpersonal relationships have a great role in our everyday life. Getting married is one of the most important interpersonal relationships you will ever encounter. There are barriers is every relationship you are responsible to effectively maintain those interactions. Our self-concept is developed through our interpersonal relationships and changes over time.

Emotional intelligence also has an impact on how effective a relationship will be. The amount of discloses vary depending on the title relationship can have both negative and positive effects. Interpersonal conflict would be one of the most challenging tests of a relationship managing these conflicts effectively is important to the relationship’s and the husband, wife mental, emotional health. Interpersonal relationships are like a puzzle with all of pieces. Imagine a puzzle with 100 small pieces, there are many so pieces that has to match or fit and connect to each in to complete the puzzle properly all the pieces must fit.

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In my relationship we have sat and talk to each other about things that is bothering us. Just like the puzzle sometimes you must connect, figure out what would fit to help you and your spouse connect. If you maintain your relationship just like you do with that puzzle it will be a beautiful relationship.

Interpersonal communication is essential in everyday it is very important most of the time there will be barriers that will make the interaction not as effective. “Along with the many beneficial functions of interpersonal communication come a number of challenges” (Bevan, 2014). Three of these challenges are misperceptions, long distance relationships, and intergenerational relationships.

Interpersonal communications have an important part of every relationship often there are barriers that causes the interaction not as effective. First, are the misperceptions that occur majority of the time the cause of this is noise that affects how effective the communication is between individuals. For example, sometimes my children keep me from engaging with my significant and others they may take the no response personal. This is a misperception caused by noise (too much going on). Second, is when you’re having a long-distance relationship which can cause financial issues because of travel, and tension and stress along with several other challenges Again, Bevan & Sole address long distance relationship. This encounter had in my marriage when my husband was deployed the distant caused all of misperception, misunderstanding and miscommunication. Hope this doesn’t take an effect on your relationship.

Sometimes my husband would send a text saying he loves me just to let me know I was running through his mind. Reassurance your significant other is a great way to show your significant other know that they still think about you. As Bevan and Sole suggest, these types of distant relationships can have both challenges and opportunity (Bevan, 2014). third is when there is an intergenerational relationship which can cause issues because of being in a different stage of life which changes communication styles, different economic states, and age-related stereotypes. This plays a big part of relationships because we all came from different generational backgrounds. There are differences in how you’re raised. For example, my husband and I were raised very different. My husband was raised by his late grandmother. I was raised by my mother and step-father. There are many things we do different because of the way we were raised. It can also provide new and different insights into the world around you (Bevan, 2014). You can learn from one another backgrounds to help you overcome many encounters.

Self-concept will affect your identity and the way you perceive yourself and other things. Self-concept takes toads on your communication, relationship. “Researchers proved that self-concept is a complex refection on how we see ourselves, what others have told us about ourselves, and what society says we should be” (Bevan,2014). “Though self-concept is an internal process, it is learned, maintained, and can change through interpersonal communication” (Bevan, 2014). Our self-concept is created through the interpersonal relationships over the years of growth. Sometimes we tend to let what others see or have define us as change our self-concept through your interpersonal communications. Having a positive self-concept will help you maintain a successful relationship. When others say negative things about you, your mind begin to trigger you to believe these things are true it will affect your relationship.

Being emotionally intelligent is a very important aspect of any relationship. It is important to not only understanding and controlling your feelings, also the person you are having a relationship with. According to Michelle Pence and Andrea Vickery (2012), “being able to listen in an active-empathic way is positively related to having emotional intelligence, which involves the ability to monitor, regulate, and restrain from your own and your partner’s feelings in order to guide your thoughts and actions” (Salovey & Mayer, 1990) (Bevan, 2014). There are several American Journals about Family Therapy, they mirror a lot on emotional intelligence and being able to point out emotions in yourself and others surrounding you (Malouff, 2014). Being able to empathetic on what your partner has to say is a very important factor to your relationship. “One of the primary benefits of relational partners sharing their thoughts and feelings with each other is that doing so helps each partner understand the emotions of the other person. It is for this reason that researchers call empathy ‘a central and crucial’ component of healthy romantic couple functioning” (Bevan, 2014). If your significant other is talking to you, its very important stop and listen to what he or she is saying. Sometimes its ok just listen and not have nothing to say. I always wait if it’s a heated moment because your point or feelings wouldn’t be relevant. If both you and your significant is both in rage. If you don’t have good communication in your relationship this would cause many your relationship to have issues.

As I mentioned prior listening is key factor in a healthy relationship. According to Bevan and Sole (2014), Listening skills are some of the most important ways in which you express consideration for other people—by making good eye contact, appropriately smiling, being engaged with the other person, and responding with meaningful questions and comments When you make your partner feel important and loved it builds a stronger bond. “Not listening during an interaction, then you cannot understand or process what others are saying, you won’t be able to responsd appropriate to what they are saying, your feedback would be poor feedback” (Bevan, 2014). Listening leads to better more comprehensive conversations between the two of you. Titus and Riyah take effort to analyze your relationship.

Everyone has the aspiration to feel close to others and exchange stories of their lives, how much self- disclosure should be shared and how do you what to share and what not to share. Starting new relationships can be tricky because you to don’t won’t get to personal with the person. It will open feelings on the other person end causing them to be vulnerable. “Sharing very personal or revealing information may create a vulnerability that threatens the person’s position in the relationship” (Murstein &Adler,1995Terzino, 2009). On the other hand, being married is a bit different when sharing self- disclosure information can give you the opportunity to learn your spouse. This will help you to know who you are married to. When sharing self-disclosure when married gives you channels to grow with each other.

You will always encounter some form of conflict in every relationship the key is how to approach it that would determine the success in your relationship. Taking full control of conflict is the most common outcome but resolution of the conflict is recommended. “Although management is the most likely conflict outcome, it can be problematic when conflicts become serial arguments” (Bevan, 2014). For example, if Riyah tells you Titus daily that she does not like you talking to MaryAnn about your personal issues and you say you will not but its repeated and constantly brought up, this is an example of conflict management. It is important to find ways to avoid this conflict, so that it does not continue to happen. Bevan and Sole (2014) stated a three-step resolution to be obtained and to occur: three things must occur for a resolution to happen: “The parties in the conflict decide to end the conflict. The parties are both satisfied with the outcome of the conflict. The parties do not engage in or deal with the conflict again”. conflict management are basically disagreeing to agreeing which are common in relationships. If the conflict isn’t resolved the conflict are more than likely to occur again. For the well-being of the relationship its beat to come to a common ground and resolve to conflict.

Titus and Riyah this concludemy advice to you all, if you do everything you can to keep your relationship healthy by striving for greatness on a daily bases it will be a great marriage. mentioned earlier it is like a 100 pieced puzzle and needs all the parts to fit together. Constantly look at ways to better your communication and conflict resolution with each other. Communicating is your main propriety. My husband and I wish you guy well in your engagement marriage is a beautiful thing no one is prefect conflicts come and go remember communication is key.