Overcoming Obstacles: Blessing in Disguise

Through all walks of life there are difficulties and struggles that we cannot escape. Conceiving a child is one of the happiest times of anyone’s lives. However, it can prove to be some of the hardest and scariest times for some as well. People may have preferences as to whether they would like a boy or a girl, but one thing is certain, all parents want a healthy baby. In a perfect world, all babies would be born healthy with no issues, but the reality is nearly 120,000 children a year are born with a disability.

When it comes to these disabilities, there is such a broad spectrum; this spectrum ranges from behavioral disorders, learning disabilities, to neurological disabilities. I got the chance to sit down with Angela, a twenty-nine year old mother of two to speak about her son’s disability, this is her story.

When Angela was just twelve weeks pregnant with her second child, a boy, they were told that their son would have Down syndrome.

Despite the doctor suggesting to terminate the pregnancy, she just could not imagine going down that path. The doctors first detected a thickening of the back of the neck called the nuchal fold which usually indicates Down syndrome. When Down syndrome was confirmed, Angela and her boyfriend remained hopeful and positive. She knew that raising this second child would be tougher and something new, but she knew that he was coming into her life as a blessing.

One of the most common defects accompanying Down syndrome is a heart defect of some kind.

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This proved to be true as Angela was given the news that her son also had an atrioventricular septal defect. Despite the difficult news, she remained positive and looked forward to the new addition to her family. Three weeks before her due date, she was rushed to the hospital and it was time to bring Adam into the world. After birth, Adam remained in an incubator and his condition was actually worse than expected. One of his heart valves was leaking and as a result, liquid was accumulating in his lungs; he had to be rushed into open heart surgery. After seven excruciating hours, Adam was off of bypass but needed to stay in the hospital for six weeks. After those six long weeks in the hospital, Angela was finally able to take Adam home.

Angela has been a mother of a perfectly healthy girl, so she wasn’t exactly sure what to expect when she brought Adam home. The fear of not being able to care for him properly took over her. The first few days proved to be tough on Angela, but not physically. She was emotionally drained and had anxiety about what the future held for Adam. When her boyfriend noticed signs of depression, he suggested seeing a therapist which allowed her to have an open and honest conversation about her fears with someone outside of the family.

As the days progressed, caring for Adam became easier and more normal. Despite his disability, Adam was learning new things, showing emotions and overcoming obstacles every day. As an outsider, you would think that the upbringing of a child with Down syndrome is harder than any other child, but when Angela responded to that she said raising him was almost exactly like her daughter, just with more doctors’ appointments and a lot more support from family and medical professionals. With Down syndrome many obstacles have to be overcome such as language comprehension and fine motor skills. Angela says that although Adam, who is now three, cannot speak clear and precise words, he does communicate in his own way.

He instead expresses his needs and wants through emotions and a few words in sign language. Throughout these past three years, Angela has had so much support through family members, friends, specialists and therapists. Adam has an occupational therapist who has been working with him since he was one year old. Some of the greatest obstacles overcome with his therapists help has been learning some words in sign language to help him communicate better and standing on his own. Although these accomplishments have been delayed, every single one has been celebrated to continue encouraging little Adam to keep learning and persevering.

Living with a disability proves to be difficult in different aspects of everyday life. It is how we choose to carry on and persevere through the obstacles that define us. For Angela, bringing Adam into this world with Down syndrome was scary at first but has turned out to be such a blessing. For just three short years of life, Adam has overcome so much and has brought so much happiness to everyone around him. There are so many families across the world that are living with a disability and it is important for them to build a normal family dynamic. The one thing Angela would like everyone to know is that they are a normal family just like everybody else.

They go through the same ups and downs, and accomplishments as any other families; they just have different things to celebrate and different things to reward. Her wish is for Adam to live an independent life and for him to find happiness and love.