Grandparent: When I'm 75

In my original When I’m 75 essays I wrote that I would be living in N.C. in a big four bedroom home in a retirement community for ages 55 and over. I would have grey or silver hair with some fine lines on my face as I would be taking care of my health, beauty, and body by working out, going to the spa for facial treatments, eating right etc. I also wrote that I would be traveling to occupy myself to the different countries that I haven’t been too during my young years.

All of my debt would be paid before retirement and I would keep in contact with my close friends and family. Well, that has changed somewhat. Since I started this class and as I read the chapters that were assigned to us and going over the rest of the assignments I have been able to learn a lot about aging and what to expect when I reach that juncture in my life.

The first thing that I think would change is living in a huge house by myself and maintaining said house alone. I think this would be too much for me unless one of my children and or their children move in with me and not as a caregiver unless necessary but as a companion, if I’m still single. I saw this happen in the video “Alzheimer’s: Every Minute Counts” with Phyllis Shannon where her husband passed away and she’s living alone in her home for 7 months and she’s unable to keep up with her home (due to Alzheimer’s Disease).

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For example, she can’t find her purse, she’s looking for car keys that she doesn’t have anymore, and the house is too big for her to maintain, she had a fire in the house which isn’t safe for her.

As far as aging again I think that I will age well based on my family genes and hereditary although I will keep up with my appearance by visiting the spa and having facials done at least once a month if it’s affordable, working out going by going to the gym or even taking a walk at the trail close to home. Hopefully, I will be able to work out as of a few weeks I was diagnosed with the beginning stages of Arthritis which runs in my family as well. Arthritis is painful inflammation and stiffness of the joints. I have it in my hands, lower back and knees. I’ve been taking precautions by going to a physical therapist now rather than later and taking some medications when it flares up. I will keep doing these things well into my old age if I’m able to.

I would also, still travel to the different places that I didn’t have a chance to see when I was younger. I will probably do this with a travel companion such as my children or grandchildren or even an old friend like I do now. I like to have companionship in most of the things I do as I’m always surrounded by my friends and especially family. I don’t think that will change as I grow older.

I found out while working on the assignment for Chapter 11 and during my interview with an elder that being lonely and being alone are two different feelings and that people can be content and live alone as being alone is a choice that someone makes and is content with that choice. For example in my Interview an Elder I asked Cornell why he didn’t ever marry and he responded “It was my choice and I’m a loner. I like to be alone and I’m content this way”. Which brings me back to what is stated in Ch. 11 on loneliness “Some people who choose to live alone are no lonelier than people who live with others (Rubenstein & Shaver, 1981) (Pg. 303). It is said that loneliness has an adverse impact on health-promoting behaviors, can increase exposure to stressful events, can have negative effects on appraisal and coping processes….that replenish physiological reserves. (Pg. 303).

For me I like to be surrounded by others and I find great satisfaction in my social interactions with my family, peers, clergy etc. and I know this will be one of the ways in which I will keep myself soul young and intact because my social support has always been a strong one and hopefully that will be the case as I move towards my older years.

Grandparenting for me is one of the things that are important to me it’s like I get a second chance at parenting and possibly doing it better this time. One of the styles that I find myself in as a grandparent is that of the fun-seeking style (Pg. 319) as I see myself enjoying activities with my grandkids talking with them, playing games with them, going to the movies, etc. this has allowed me to establish a positive, nurturing, caring, role with my grandkids. This is also linked with generativity which means to care about the next generation and planting positive seeds within them towards the future. I want to make a positive contribution/influence in their lives.

I think keeping busy is the key as stated in Ch. 12 “Physical activity reduces the incidence of illness, prevents specific diseases, and contributes to overall health in older adults”. (Pg. 393). I will also try to stay away from negative friends and family as it has been proven scientifically that negativity affects older people in a bad way. For example, you can become depressed, hostile, become a cynic, can lead to stress, heart attacks, and add years to your life. https://www.rd.com/health/wellness/negative-thoughts-aging/

As far as cognitive changes I must say that right now I struggle with some memory, reasoning and abstract thinking. Sometimes I feel like I might be getting Alzheimer’s or Dementia because I forget a lot of things sometimes or I can’t formulate a sentence at the spur of the moment. I worry a lot about this as my grandmother and two of her sisters passed away from this Degenerative Disease and wonder if I’m going to have it once I reach old age. Although my grandma and her sisters didn’t acquire Alzheimer’s until well into their mid-80’s. I plan to rectify this by repeating key points in various ways, checking for understanding. People that I speak with say that we’re so overloaded with information that we tend to forget certain things. I hope this is the case. Chapter 8 speaks about Processing Speed and how information processing might be a factor in the decline of intellectuality. It was said in this chapter that the outcome of the study done was the total opposite at it showed that performance was exceptionally high (Pg. 225). I hope that this is the case with me.

I also have noticed several physical changes, for example, I’m not as fast as I used to be. I have noticed that my agility and mobility has been compromised somewhat because of the Arthritis although that doesn’t stop me from doing the things that I love to do and it won’t be a factor as I grow older unless something happens to me that impedes me from moving around. I’ve seen some changes in my hearing that have been concerning me, for example, I’m not able to hear as well as I used to when I was younger. Sometimes when people speak to me and if we are surrounded by the noise I have to ask them to repeat themselves. I’m going to have a study done to see what this is all about and hopefully, it won’t have any negative or long-time effects.

In regards to my income, this is something that worries me as I become older and looking into reaching the 75-year mark because as we have studied when it concerns Social Security and retirement things aren’t looking well for those of us who’re reaching that age bracket in the near future. With the way the economy is heading and the government wanting to change Social Security by privatizing it we might not have much income to survive on.

This is why I have a savings account and I set up a 403B with my employer in the event that Social Security isn’t around anymore so that I can have a nice little nest egg in my old age where I can at least survive on a budget and that’s if the stock market doesn’t crash. LOL! According to my readings on Social Security benefits, some people are for privatizing it and some aren’t I think that it shouldn’t be privatized only because a portion of this money depends on how well or bad the stock market is and if the stock market crashes there goes our Social Security pension and our livelihood. This is why I have a plan B and plan C stashed away for a rainy day.

In conclusion, hopefully, when I turn 75 years old I’m in overall great health, financially stable, traveling around the world enjoying the latter part of my life alongside my family and friends.