There is hardly a more difficult job than being a parent. Parents are responsible for their children and they have to provide them with everything they need. It is not easy to bring up children appropriately. It is impossible to utilize the definite model of bringing up whereas this process is individual and depends on the child’s personality and temperament. Some children require constant attention from the side of their parents. Others are already independent at the age of seven.
They can play alone or with friends without the involvement of their mothers and fathers. There are two major approaches towards bringing up. The foremost approach is loyal is amiable. Parents provide their children with freedom and do not limit them in anything. Another approach is opposite. Parents bring up their children strictly choosing whom to play with, where to go and how to behave. The latter method is becoming more and more popular in our society and I will try to find out why.
Modern psychologists say that parents should give more freedom to their children. On the one hand, they are right. Children should have choice and their personal opinion about everything. However, there are many cases when parents know better, what is good and bad for their child. Children cannot think about complicated serious and strategic matters. Thus, it is not right to let children eat, wear and do whatever they want until they are independent. When one cannot support himself and depends on money and help of his parents, he cannot be free.
Of course, there are issues when one should have his own mind and choice. It is useful if you want to bring up an active and conscious person.
Many parents are strict to their children. They behave like dictators and limit the child’s freedom in everything. Why do they behave in this way? There are several answers to this question. Firstly, it is fear and helplessness. Parents love their children so much that they are afraid of the negative impact of natural and social environment on them. No wonder, children are not allowed to swim, ride a bike, have a dog or play with the ‘suspicious’ mates. Parents make their kids play musical instruments or dance instead of permitting them to spend time with their schoolmates. They protect children from our society. Sad to say but this extensive love is very harmful for children. When parent always decide for their son, he will not be able to become a successful leader of a big corporation inasmuch as he has not got used to thinking for himself. He cannot live without parents even if he is almost forty years old. Such indecisive people have troubles with communication and career making whereas they are too dependent on others.
Another explanation of strictness is the fear of the mistakes parents had in the past. When a mother sees her daughter in the similar situation she had in the past, she will try to protect her from this mistake forasmuch she knows about its consequences. Unfortunately, it is hard to make children change their mind about anything. Strictness can hardly help in this case. Parents should explain their strictness and fear to persuade their children in something. Children should understand the source or the cause of strictness.
Without question, there are parents who were raised strictly and they continue this tradition in their own families. Frankly speaking, strictness is a traditional model of bringing up. Centuries ago, children were afraid of their parents because they could do anything to them. Lack of freedom and strict punishment were common in every family. If you listen to your grandparents, they will surely speak about their ‘difficult’ childhood. Children had to work hard helping their parents about the house. They had to make money and provide themselves as soon as possible. Therefore, the elderly people say that modern young people are lazy and careless. They do not have to worry about their future whereas they are supported by parents.
Finally, there are strict parents who do not know how to bring up children. They do not understand that children are inexperienced and unintelligent. Thus, their reaction to every mistake is frustration and anger. They shout at their children and practice corporal punishment believing that these methods are useful.
In conclusion, strictness is a natural habit of every parent because they worry about their children and want to protect them from the negative environment. In fact, strictness should be limited, otherwise, it can cause harm to the child’s psychics.