While men and women both want companionship, not all companions and relationships are healthy for them. Victims of child abuse who grow up to form intimate relationships naturally, carry emotion, anger and resentment. They are triggered at anything that reminds them of what they experience growing up or even from previous relationships. Domestic violence happens when one person out the two people in a relationship wants to control the whole relationship and the person they are with. (Turley 117). Just like Child abuse, domestic violence is not always reported so the number of incidents that occur are not truly accurate.
For example, in musical artist, Jihan Jeffers-Cooper, who goes by the stage name Eve Love is Blind music recording. The song is based on the real-life story of Eves best friend, Andrea (Jeffers-Cooper and Andrea). The words tell a story about how she had so much hate for someone she didnt know. All she knew was that her best friend was dating a guy that would constantly physically, verbally and emotionally abuse her and she tried to do everything she could to help her.
Eve opens the song with a heavy feeling of hate and resentment for a man she doesnt even know,
Hey, you I don’t even know you and I hate you
See all I know is that my girlfriend used to date you
How would you feel if she held you down and raped you?
Tried and tried, but she never could escape you (Jeffers-Cooper)
The victims biggest fear that keeps them from leaving is their abuser finding them or hurting their family.
The feeling of being weak and unsure of how they will make it leaves them with no choice but to go back to what their abuser. This is one thing that someone who isnt or was abused will never know or understand. During the interview that Queen Latifahs conducted with Eve and Andrea, He worked in the streets so he knew people, he said he could have me killed by people on the streets (Jeffers-Cooper and Andrea). Not all, but most cases of domestic violence against woman end in severe mental and emotional damage or death. Domestic violence does not discriminate against men or women either. You are will more than likely hear stories about woman as victims of abuse than men. One can only guess assume men dont report being abused because of pride. Leaving an abusive environment can be very difficult for some if they are not ready to face their abuser. The advice that all victims receive in these circumstances is often to leave immediately or even call 911. As easy as it is to say, its not that easy for a victim of abuse to just leave. It takes time, strategic planning and knowing that they will be able to push through the start over process. Most of the reported cases are woman who were battered by a significant other. The National Coalition against Domestic Violence stats that 10 million Americans are abused year by a significant other or companion (NCADV). The NCADV also states that, 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men are victims of domestic violence during their lifetime (NCADV). 76% of females are victims of domestic violence, while 24% are men (NCADV). But, only 1 in 7 women are severely injured because of abuse, and 1 in 18 men are also severely injured because of abuse (NCADV). After numerous studies and collected data most women who were the victim of domestic violence cases endured abuse between the ages of 18-24 and 25-34. When the Womens Act was in 1994 was started the number of domestic violence cases decreased by 67% (NCADV). In 1994, President Bill Clinton signed the first Womens Act bill to call attention to the high numbers are abuse cases against women (Ami Lynch). It was initially enacted as title IV of the violent crime control and law enforcement act. This gave way for many other places to start programs to help the victims of abuse, such as, the office of violence against women (Ami Lynch). This are just one of the many resolutions that were put in place to protect women against their abusers. Domestic Violence has been the cause of various long- term health problems for people from different backgrounds and genders. Although no victim will ever get forget what happened to them, they will begin to heal with help being provided to them once it is sought out.