D. Dozier Narrative Essay November 13, 2007 Word count: 809 My Little Blessings Children have a tendency to bring out the very best in people. I can say I have been fortunate to have four little blessings of my own. I consider each of them as a blessing and each day I am reminded of how much they mean to me. My children have brought out the best in me–parts that I never knew existed. As children grow, so do parents. I have evolved into a better person with the courage to overcome all obstacles because of the love that I have for my children. At the age of twenty, my life was full of constant turmoil and instability.
I had a plan, and children were not a part of it. I never imagined that I would ever have children. Motherhood was not for me and, if you had known me, you would have agreed. When I got pregnant for the first time, I was in complete denial. I ignored the fact that I was pregnant because I was unable to accept reality. Reality did not set in until I gave birth to my daughter. On December 17, 2000, something more than giving birth changed my perception of life. My life completely changed that day and not because I had a baby. My transformation was more spiritually focused. As my daughter, Israel grew so did I, internally.
Because of the love of my little girl, I became a more centered individual. Once I had found my center, I thought that I was on track. However, I was reminded of my past when I gave birth to my son Isaiah. My son was born with a disease known as atopic dermatitis. I was very familiar with this disease because I suffered with it for many years. I was hurt when I discovered that he would have to go through what I did. I blamed myself for what was happening to him. I beat myself up for a while, until my son helped me to realize a very important fact. The nervousness, allergies and irritated skin are all things that I had went through.
He made me realize that instead of feeling sorry for myself, I should be glad that I could help him. I understood his pain and could relate to the severity of the situation. Due to past obstacles, I was able to make a potentially bad situation better. Through the love for my son, I developed the ability to remain positive even during the most difficult times in life. Although I gained the knowledge to be a more stable and positive individual, something was still missing in my life. The missing piece soon fell into place upon the birth of my twin boys, Irijah and Isaac. A multiple birth was a miracle within itself.
It seemed unreal because no one in my family was ever blessed with two babies. Although it took a lot of adjustment, we made it through the baby period. The hard part did not come until they became toddlers. (During this time), I noticed complications (in the development) (of the twins). I soon learned that although they were perfect on the outside my boys were suffering with autism. Irijah is severely autistic while Isaac’s is mild. I knew that in order to conquer this obstacle, changes would have to be made. In the beginning I was unaware of what needed to be done, but I never gave up.
I continue to fight for my boys and struggle to keep my sanity. This has been the toughest fight of my life because it involves a series of changes. These changes dealt with acceptance, transition, and adaptation. These were necessary steps because it gives the boys a chance to lead a somewhat normal life. Through the love of my sons, I have learned to adapt to change and have gained strength and perseverance that is necessary in life. In life you must choose a path. I used to believe that setting goals and making decisions would lead me to the right chosen path. However, because of my children, I learned that I was not choosing.
I was just dreaming. My dreams were nothing more than a thought because I did not have proper structure. My children are not aware of how much of an impact they have been in my life. When I look back on my life, I have no regrets because my life could have taken a path a lot less fulfilling. For the first time in my life, I am complete and that feeling could have only come from them. I am truly blessed to have my children in my life. The unconditional love that I share with my children has undoubtedly transformed me into a more focused, confident, and stronger woman.