This paper will describe a critical incident which happened last month in college while the group and I were discussing an earlier lecture and giving feedback to the lecturer.
While I was describing how I felt aabout the subject another student rudely interrupted and began speaking over me. This was unexpected and without reason.The conversation was taken away from me and I felt that the person then used my points of view and made it sound as if they were their ideas.
The lecturer did not seem to notice this and allowed them to continue
When this incident happened I became upset and very angry. I felt at the time that my contribution was not valued. My emotions were running high and I went to the bathroom and cried. I was concerned that the others in my group would think that I was been silly and making something out of nothing. I was really mad at the person who interrupted me.
I began to feel that this person disliked me and I wondered why they showed me such disrespect. I felt as if I had been dismissed and criticised. This threw me off balance and I began to question myself and my abilities.
Maybe the other person was justified in their actions and that my point of view was indeed not relevant or important. After all the lecturer didn’t seem to notice either. At the time I felt my fears were justified because the same incident had happened before on a number of occasions although not in the classroom setting.
The way in which I choose to handle the situation had a negative knock-on effect on my college life. For a while afterwards I struggled to let go of the hurt I felt. I focused on possible motives to why it happened. I became quiet in tutorials and lectures where I didn’t ask questions or make comments.
On reflection, I think I probably over reacted to the situation. I have a tendency to do this and feel annoyed at little things. I don’t like losing control and when I do I become defensive. The person may just have been impatient and thoughtless. Perhaps they were eager to speak and I was taking too long to have my say. It’s possible that they thought that what I was saying wasn’t revelevent or it was something that they already knew.
I feel that I have gained a great deal from this experience in a positive way. Looking back I initially I felt rejected and wronged. I found it difficult to deal with what I took to be a criticism. However,having moved forward I realise that it is crucial for me to develop new skills to enable me to take a step back in similar situations and not to react so quickly. To do this I will try to identify my triggers and take a deep breath before I jump to conclusions.
After analysing this incident I have recognised how important it is to be sensitive and empathetic towards others especially while interpreting their actions. As a social care practitioner I will encounter many similar situations where I will have to remain patient and non judgemental while working with service users. The experience has taught me to be more aware of my feelings and I have discovered the need to work on my own emotions so I can become an effective and successful professional in the future.