The sample essay below for “A New Way of Doing Business With your own Children” explores the importance of family ties. The issue of communication between parents and their children is also raised.
Parents are our caretakers, guardians, educators even judge and jury all at once. Reliable at most times, overprotective at other times and with this constant nurture comes expectations and frustration. For the better part of history, parents have always created a new way of doing things with their very own children due to the experiences they may have had as a child.
As witnessed in poems A Note On My Sons Face by Toi Derricotte and How I Got That Name by Marilyn Chin, it is not the easiest to live up to the expectations of our parents but after years of family tradition it becomes easier to let go of the habits that no longer resonate with children as they bolt into adulthood.
Often times, children are seen as a prize possession to the family, a new journey to begin and other times children as seen as the complete opposite.
In Toi Derricottes A Note On My Sons Face the grandmother in the poem is clearly emotionally attached to this newborn when she states, I think of the peace of walking through the house, pointing to the name of this, the name of that, and educator of a new man. This quote substantiates the text, solidifying my stance that indeed parents are caretakers and protective over their children due to the fact that most parents dreamed of having children at a certain moment in life.
The author dreams of the day where she would peacefully walk around the house with her grandchild, being someone he will look up to someday.
The grandmother releases tensed joy, she loves him but doesnt love what he symbolizes. This idea is concluded when she states, His face was too dark, nose too broad, mouth too wide. These are all known as African American or to put it blatantly, black features and she hates what this represents for her grandson based on history and having those features in the grandmother’s time meant you were placed in a rather unpleasant category: Negroes; who were enslaved at a very young age.
The author sets the mood and tone for the audience, allowing readers to feel and understand why she hated the features of this new addition to the family, her grandchild, for fear of something no child should have to grow or go through. On one hand, the author seems to be very over protective and unappreciative of this child, instead of loving and recognizing the worth of this baby, she tries to change him in her view, hoping that he will escape the inevitable. Did I bend over his nose and straighten it with my fingers like a vine growing the wrong way? Did he feel my hand in malice?